Unschooling philosophy holds that learning is necessarily an active undertaking of the learner rather than a passive reception of information or instruction from a teacher. An unschooling parent’s responsibility, then, is not to teach, but to help children learn.
Some unschoolers do use the word "teach" – translation: "help learn" – with a noncoercive slant to the meaning. Unschoolers can boycott the word "teach" or they can reclaim it for their own uses.
Helping Children Learn is Non-Coercive
Unschooling parents respect and celebrate the variety of ways children learn naturally. They trust that children want to learn and, thus, have no need of coercion masquerading as encouragement, incentive, or any other external motivation.
Children naturally rebel against coercive teaching. Coercion disrespects the child and may harm the child’s self-confidence. In other words, coercion disregards the child’s feelings and needs. In effect, coercion is counter productive.
Children Want to Learn Useful Skills
As social creatures, children never require coercion (i.e., threats, pressure, material incentives) to inspire them to want to fit in. They naturally want to connect and join in community. They want to contribute and play an important role. They want to learn useful skills (reading, writing, math, scientific observation, etc.), because they need those tools to navigate the world. If those skills were not useful, they would not need them.
Unschooling parents trust that their children will seek out useful skills when they need them. However, this is not to say that unschooling parents necessarily wait for their children to specifically request information or guidance regarding a particular skill. An unschooling parent may offer help or new information at any time.
Misperceptions of Unschooling
Children learn by exploring, trying things, asking questions, and asking for help when they need it. A common misperception of unschooling is that unschooling parents do not help their children learn.
New unschooling parents may hesitate to initiate conversations or activities which resemble teaching. However, unschooling philosophy fully supports any interaction with children in which the children are interested and receptive.
Outwardly, this may look like a homeschool curriculum or lap book, for example, but the activity will be lacking any coercive or mandatory element. As long as children are on board, unschooling parents will share with them all that they know and help them find the answers to any questions for which they do not have ready answers. If they already knew all the answers, they would miss out on many mystery solving and treasure seeking adventures.
People of all ages are born naturally social. Part of this nature is the desire to belong and contribute to communities. People find their places in community by learning all that they can about the people and the world around them. If unschooling parents remain available to their children, spend a lot of time with them, and have fun together, the children will feel safe and confident enough to step out into the world to learn even more.
You might also enjoy: The Unschooling Collection
Sara McGrath - Sara is a veteran homeschool mom of three, Usborne consultant, and the author of Unschooling: A Lifestyle of Learning.
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